Day 4030


Day 4030: Initial response to stay in bed has continued to prove itself a better option then the drudgery of the day. Overcast skies and the sound of fans lull me into a trance. There is nowhere to go but forward but in this moment I see only a wall ahead and a pack of wolves behind.

I have yet to master wall climbing in this place, as it seems the walls are covered in the most slippery of slimes. That being said, the wolves seem to be satiated with the rations of my soul, which at this point have become slim.

The truth is at first I danced with these wolves, I was able to captivate and charm them with my muse like personality.  Now we have become the captivators of our own destiny here, a tumultuous addiction to each other letting go had not been a real consideration. No, it had to be blood, life taken in a slow decay. And over the years we both have forgotten that within us is the key to the room; that it only takes one of us to open the world we didn’t know.

I had forgotten too.

Even now, writing these words, I forget what it really means to walk in the world without the fear of being torn apart.

Even now I forget the sensation of turning the key and seeing light and life spill upon the floor.

Even now, when I forget so much, I remember to remember outside of this place there is more; there is hope. 

On the gloomiest of days I wake with the lingering memory that somewhere in this universe the most spectacular of sunrises happens and the most magical of dusks creeps in.

And in this self made memory I become larger than all that I believe I am not.


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